Performance Anxiety

Three years ago I had a son. He was beautiful and precious. Our first born. Everything was new and amazing and overwhelming. My husband and I watched every little milestone, every new smile. My son wore the cleanest clothes, played with the most educational toys, and ate the healthiest foods. As his first birthday approached I dreamed about the cake I would make for him. I struggled with the perfect design and how I could encapsulate absolutely every aspect of his personality and my love for him within the confines of pastry. Yeah, no small feat.

After weeks of thought and hours of painstaking work, this is what I created:



Each tier was made to represent favorite bedtime stories that I read to him. Then the whole cake was tilting as he climbed to the top to reach his "smash cake". I was pretty proud of this one.

Then I became pregnant with my second child. Someone jokingly said, at some point during my pregnancy, "How are you going to top that first 1st birthday cake?" And that's when the terror set in.

My second son was born on November 5th, 2008. Another beautiful boy who showed me his dimples the second he was in my arms. If you haven't heard, adding a second child is more like multiplication than addition. Suddenly there are two to feed and change, two to rock to sleep and cuddle. And the first year just flew by. Suddenly I was faced with the big date on the calendar and the terror was there again. How was I going to create a beautiful and sentimental token of my undying love for my child in cake form?

Then one day, not too long before the cake was due, I started looking at pictures. And this is what I created:



A collage of my son's first year, some of the things he loves (music, beach balls, blankets) and bright colours. This would be the cake's stage.

Aside from his bubbly personality and stunning dimply smile, my son loves to be upside down. He crawls and climbs in an effort to flip himself over. So, I thought nothing would be more appropriate than a cake that would do the same.



Happy birthday, sweet boy. I hope that you like your special cake. I hope you know that just because you came second, there's no second place in my heart.